LETTER WRITING HAS LOST ITS BRAND VALUE

Rintu: - The situation is still very bad. In our Engineering College, only 19 people have got placed till now, out of 193 students. As it is a recession market, many companies have stopped recruitment and the other companies are recruiting B.Sc graduates at low cost instead of taking B-TECH students. Even the Post Graduate college students are also facing the same problem. No companies are recruiting MBA students now. For finance, HR and marketing jobs, they are recruiting only B.Com, B.A and B.Sc guys respectively. My elder sister Geeta is yet to get a job.

Arindam: - There are no new assignments. So, there are no need for research, analysis and innovative strategies. All you need is to do the same mechanical works like pouring water from this glass to that glass and vice-versa. But, big companies never compromise with their recruitment strategy. They never stop their R&D and Market Analysis and maybe that is why, they are still the best companies in the market. They always recruit B-TECH people for programming, MBA people for research and analysis. See, the logic is very simple; if you paint a black leopard like a tiger, that animal can never become a real Royal Bengal Tiger.

Niharika: - Rintu, why are you trying to get a job in Kolkata only? There are only 2-3 big IT companies here. Try your luck in Bangalore, Pune and Chennai. For an Engineer, these three cities are the best place. Arindam, don’t try to look for a finance job in Kolkata. In this city, all the jobs are accounts based only. A B.Com graduate is sufficient for that job. Their job is like doing data entries, calculating NAV values or calculating loans and checking how much loan have been repaid. This kind of a job is like a clerical job in a bank. Where is the use of MBA studies here? Ideal finance job is there, where you advice a client about investing in a particular stock to gain profits, then portfolio valuations, hedging and arbitraging, etc. A company recruits a MBA guy to make sure that he can do the marketing of their balance sheets and P&L statement in such a fashion that investors start investing on their market shares. Come to Mumbai, which is an ideal place for a MBA finance guy to start a great career in Finance and then excel in it. Arindam, you should become serious about your life.

Arindam:- Anyway, thanks for your lectures, but, as you very well know that I have always sailed my ship without using any Mariner’s Compass and maybe, that is why, after surviving in all the storms in the oceans, I got transformed into a warrior from a mere common man. Mumbai is the only metro city of India, which I have never visited in my lifetime. I will surely try to visit Mumbai.

Subhendu: - She is saying these things, because she is also working in Mumbai. But, Niharika, don’t underestimate your hometown, Kolkata. It also provides good finance jobs, but maybe at a very senior level; that’s the problem. Why don’t you guys try for PSU banks? A Government employee always gains, whenever there is a recession.

Arindam: - You have to be expert in all the grammatical rules of Wren & Martin to crack a PO Exam. As a student of West Bengal Board, I have not even learned 1% of English language. There are so many tricks in the English language. And what to say about essay writing and letter writing, it is not so easy at all.

Subhendu: - The problem lies elsewhere. Today, in this age of Internet Online chatting, the new generation people have forgotten how to write a letter. If I tell one boy to write a love letter to his girlfriend, you will find ample number of grammatical errors in that letter. I am a M.A, LLB pass student and now working as a lawyer. Believe me; if you don’t have the full fledged knowledge all English words and the grammatical tricks, you will not even understand the head and tail of some big statements mentioned in some sections of our Indian Penal Code. Habit of letter writing will only help you to understand the tricks of English language. From a Cover Letter to a Business Letter, the tricks lie in the style of its unique communications. I have a book on Letter writing, where all the best letters of the world are printed. In those days, Business & Legal Communication in English was just superb because of the habit of letter writing. Today, in this Internet Age, “LETTER WRITING HAS LOST ITS BRAND VALUE”.

ANY INDIAN STUDENT HAVING DEGREE OF AUSTRALIAN DEGREE WILL BE CONSIDERED INVALID

Arindam: - Hi, I am Arindam. Can we chat for some time? I think that you are a recent user of Facebook, right?

Sambhavi: - Hmm…I created my account in Facebook last week only. After all; in Australia, Facebook is more famous than Orkut.

Arindam: - What are you doing in Australia?

Sambhavi: - Well, I am studying MBA in HR under Australian University. It is a nice country to live in.

Arindam:-Oh! Really, is it so? My goodness, you are a very brave girl. But, are you not scared about the recent incidents that have occurred there? Within 3 days, two Indians have been killed. Earlier also, there were many racial attacks on Indians.

Sambhavi: - Ya, we are somewhat scared. We, the Indian students live in an Indian colony here, but you never know, when and how you will be attacked by these bloody racial Australians.

Arindam: - Ha ha ha, after all they are Australians. Do you know who actually they are? They are the British Criminals. When James Cook discovered that island, it came to be known as Cook Island. Then, gradually, British Government started sending the criminals of England to the jail of this Cook Island. But, these criminals came out of the jail, and started killing the original Tasmanian tribes of that island. Later, these British Criminals came to be known as Australians. So, naturally, they will be bloody racist for the black people.

Sambhavi: - Everywhere, these White people kill the Blacks. That is why, cases like 9/11 and bomb blasts in European countries took place.

Arindam: - No, no, please don’t confuse terrorism with the racial attacks. See, even President Obama is not a White; he belongs to the Black community. If USA people would have been racial like the Australians, then Obama could have never become a President.

Sambhavi: - But, I really don’t understand that why these Australians are killing the Indians? We, the Indians have never caused any harm to them.

Arindam: - The blood of criminals will behave like criminals only. How can you expect humanity from them? Even, the Prime Minister of Australia is a racist. And what to say about our External Affairs Minister! When someone tweets about something, he utters in front of the media, ‘I am the Boss of Mr. Tharoor’, but when Indians get killed in Australia, he whispers in his room, ‘I am basically a rat’. He should resign from this ministry. He is totally a useless fellow, doing nothing at all. By the way, why the hell do you, such students, go to Australia for higher studies? Are there no Indian Universities for higher studies?

Sambhavi: - He he he…it is very to say those things, Arindam. But, I am neither a very bright student nor belong to SC/ST/OBC quota. I am from General category. If you are not a good student and if you are not from SC/ST/OBC category, then it becomes very difficult for you to get a chance to study in any reputed MBA schools in India. On the other hand, Australian University charges more money, but their B-Schools also guarantee 100% placement to reputed companies with higher packages. Studying in Australian Universities has less expense than in studying in UK or USA Universities.

Arindam: - But, I think the Universities of UK and USA provide far better education than these bloody Australian Universities. Moreover, when you such Indian students are paying fees in Australian Universities for studies, it is indirectly boosting the Australian economy only. We, the Indians are paying for those Australian professors and they are living their life on our money, but still their countrymen are killing us; how funny it is indeed. All Indian students should stop studying in Australian Universities. Kapil Sibal should make a new education partnership for Indian students with UK and USA Universities only and should put an end to any kind of education agreements or tie-ups with Australian Universities.

Sambhavi: - Yeah, Arindam, I think the rules should be made very strict. Indian Government should make a rule that, after 2011, “ANY INDIAN STUDENT HAVING DEGREE OF AUSTRALIAN UNIVERSITY WILL BE CONSIDERED AS AN INVALID DEGREE”.

SILENT SUICIDAL SOCIETY

Vijay: - Hi, my name is Vijay. I came here in this jail of hell today only. I killed myself in our school bathroom only.

Neha: - Wow, that’s great. I also killed myself only. I am Neha. But, why this sturdy black man is caning both of us. Oh! No, please, why are you beating us with a cane? Who are you?

Ghatothkach: - I am the jailer of this jail of the hell. Both of you have committed a sin by killing yourself. So, both of you deserve severe punishment for 15 years in this jail. Every day, I will cane both of you for 1000 times.

Vijay: - This is not fair. Who is the King of this hell? Just call him. We want to talk to him only.

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Yamraaj: - Every crime has its own way of justice. Committing suicide is a sin and that is why, we are punishing you. Very simple logic; but, why both of you have committed suicide?

Vijay: - I was literally ill-treated in my family. There was always pressure on me. My parents always wanted to see me as a top-rank holder in academics. But, my brain was not so super to perform well in class. I was good in other curricular activities but not in studies. Somehow, I always felt depressed in my house. Also, teachers of the school used to scold me, many a times. I saw the case of brave Ruchika in Television. She was very brave to commit suicide and the whole world is now demanding for her justice.

Yamraaj: - Accha, Ruchika was a brave girl and her suicidal act motivated you? Ruchika is also in the jail of hell. Boss, committing suicide is a cowardice act. Only Cowards commit suicide. There is no bravery in it. If you want to die on your own, it hardly affects the society. The case of Ruchika was somewhat different. Someone molested her, which is a sin. But, in your case, it is you, who should have fought against it? Anyway, what about your case, Neha?

Neha: - I always dreamt to become a rock star. Even, I am a very good dancer. I also gave good performances in some reality shows, but still my parents don’t want me to become a rock star. They stopped me from going to dancing classes. They only want me to study and study. Am I a robot? After my suicide, everyone will request for justice for me, like in the case of Ruchika.

Yamraaj: - No, boss, your parents have not committed any sin like the DIG Rathod. As parents, they also have a duty for their children. Parents are spending so much money after your school and they cannot even request you people to study well and become good professionals of the future market in this competitive world. How irony this is? Both of you cannot be forgiven. Just go back to the jail of the hell and stay there for 15 years. After 15 years only, your soul will be given a re-birth. Hey, Urvashi, just check what Arindam is doing right now?

Urvashi: - Sir, he is now chatting online with some hot American girls in the Facebook website.

Yamraaj: - Just make a call to him. I want to talk to him.

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Arindam: - Hello, kaun? Arrey, Mr. Yamraaj, what’s the matter? Mera bhi time aa gaya hai kya? He he he…

Yamraaj: - Your death time and date is yet to get stored in my database. Can you do one thing? Just request those bloody Indian media channels to stop broadcasting about the Ruchika suicide case. Let them talk about the Rathod only, but tell them to suppress the case of suicide. That news is affecting these little children’s psychology and as a result, it is creating a “SILENT SUICIDAL SOCIETY”.

A BOAT RIDE TO HELL

Gautam: - Why are you worrying at all? We will give you 500 bucks for the boat ride. We will go near that rail bridge and then come back here. Try to understand that we are in a jovial mood today. We have come here for picnic and there will be no boat ride in the picnic; how is it possible?

Boatman: - That I can understand, but there are so many people in your picnic group. It will be very risky to board all the people in my boat.

Shakti: - Arrey, then call another boatman. We will hire two boats, not a problem.

Boatman: - saabji, 95% of the boats of this area are fishing boats. You will hardly get any passenger boats here. My boat is also a big fishing boat only. It will be a great risk for me.

Ravi: - Bhaiye, bahut baaho kha rahe ho…ok, we will give you 700 bucks. Now, don’t argue. Ei, all of you, start boarding this boat.

Shalini: - We are always very scared about boat ride. We will not go. All you men go for the ride, and come back quickly; already the cooking is about to end very soon.

Ajay: - Mom, we will also go for the boat ride.

Meena: - aaji sunteh ho, take all these children also for the boat ride. They also want to go.

Gautam: - Yeah, of course. Send them…aa jaao bacchey log…let us enjoy the boat ride.

Boatman: - My goodness, already 26 people have boarded the boat and now you are inviting around 13 children to board it.

Narayan: - Ei, majhi bhai, tum bahut lecture detey ho…Now, stop giving your lectures and start the boat.

Boatman: - saabji, I am telling these things for the safety of you people only. Hum log majhi hai, naao chalatey hain, har ek passenger is like a king for us and we always take care of their safety.

Piyush: - arrey, woh dekho, train jaah raaha hain bridge ke upar sey..

Boatman: - Please don’t stand up…please sit down. Already, the boat is having too many passengers and if you stand up like this, the boat will become misbalanced.

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Nita: - Hello viewers, you are watching RBT channel News. As you can see, people have blocked different parts of this city as a protest against the state government, as the State Police sent the rescue operation team to that river after 7 hours of the accident. Already around 20 people are still missing. The boat capsized in that river due to misbalance. All Children have drowned in the river. Some elder people, who know swimming, reached the banks safely. We will come back with this detailed news, but after a short commercial break.

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Arindam: - kya hua bhabhi? Why are you crying?

Diya: - My 13 year old Ketan and 7 year old Ritu have died in that boat accident. They went to enjoy the picnic but ended up with “A BOAT RIDE TO HELL”.